So my nerd girlfriend made this blog for me. I'm hoping my friends and brother will contribute to it as well. I'm looking at you Matt. Anyway, you will notice that I said girlfriend and not fiancee, even though I am in fact engaged. Why? Because I hate the F word. I just can't bring myself to say it, even writing it hurts. So I don't say it. And Johanna and I have been referring to each other as our "f words". Which is pretty funny on multiple levels.
This has made me think of other words and phrases that I hate. These include:
"set the date" - Also wedding related, this bugs me because you don't set the date for any other event, yet the second you get engaged every person you come into contact with asks you if you've set the date. It makes my skin crawl.
"pamper(ing)" - With Valentine's Day approaching I'm hearing this one alot more than I usually would. I think I don't like it because it makes me think of diapers. And I think it's disturbing to hear commercials on sports radio where the hosts keep using this word.
" The Countrywide Home Loans Guy" - While not a word or phrase, this guy is on TV 24/7 and I hate him. Every time one of these commercials comes on I scream and turn the channel as quickly as possible.
That's all I can think of on that topic for now. I'll try not to be so negative on my next post.
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9 months ago
4 comments:
Hey, baby! I'm so proud of you! Your first post on your first blog. That wasn't so hard, was it? My little f word. I wonder how long that joke is going to be funny. So far, so good.
nice blog...I'm impressed. especially by the picture.
anyway, when Shannon and I were engaged, she sent me an email and spelled it "finace" (easy mistake right?)...well, we thought it was great and then proceeded to call each other "fine ass"..."f word" or "fine ass". which one would you rather be?
happy blogging.
You made me laugh iwasjar. "fine ass" definitely. Especially since I have been married almost 13 years (april) and could use all the "positive" reenforcement possible. :)
ok, ill give this whole thing a go, but im going to be strait. im a bit wierded out by this whole process.
i see multiple ways of getting around the f word syndrome. mispelling is always an easy way, one im most likely to do as you will see in the future if this whole blogging fad continues. my dad used to flick my head when i spelled words wrong on my homework, so id rather not go down that road of big L-ness. good times.
the fine ass thing works too, as long as its actually fine, if its not, but youre just deluded cause you havent gotten any in a while and you just think it is, then it really puts your friends in a wierd situaish because theyre like thinking "dude your f-words ass isnt all that fine, so stop acting like it is and everything" i mean thats what a good friend would have to buck up and say anyways. i, however like the recently accomplished approach of just skipping the engagement all together and simply going from dating to married. this is really only acceptable if you follow said marriage up with an out of country (costa rician perhaps) party.
but what really chaps my fine ass is not the actual wedding, they can be fun sometimes, even if its yours. in my opinion weddings are fun because you get to watch your drunk cousins make out with that wierd groomsmen you had that made the cut somehow but youre not really sure why and in 5 years you wont even know his phone number.
and then you get to toast mike tuton, which is always a good thing. weddings are also fun because you can stop by a liquor store on the way to the reception and get really silly and take disposible cammera pictues of yourself being a lush and then forget them at the wedding only to have the really conservative mother of the bride develop them and wonder if the guy her little princess just married can be trusted or if he just has a few black sheep friends.
they are also fun because sometimes there is a reading from the bible that has the word "ass" instead of donkey, and the brides jacked up fine ass brother makes everyone laugh. but if a really tall tan guy with an accent tries to hit on your date, you just have to laugh and blow cuban cigar smoke in his face.
oh, yeah, my ass has been chapped for some reason, is that at all similar to having your ass-hole bleached. (jon thats for you baby). which naturally leads me to the current size of the Indian mans schlong. i should stop here. im not sure i know my audiance. clearly im going out of my mind.
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