More New Additions to the Family

All right nerds, I'm sorry that apparently none of you have anything better to do than read blogs. That being said, here goes....


First of all you need to listen to this song (go here and look for the song Missouri), which is both an ode to the great state that we live in and to a certain football team that is 4-0 and looking darn good. Some might even say unstoppable. The first big test is in 2 weeks @ Nebraska but I'm feeling pretty confident.

And now for the big news, I know that we said we didn’t want this blog to turn into a baby blog and everything but we have an announcement to make. Our little family is expanding….



I would like to take this opportunity to introduce you all to my new wakeboard. It is a Slingshot Recoil, 142cm long, 45cm wide, and has a 3 stage rocker. It arrived a week overdue, but it was in perfect health.

One of the guys I ride with demo'd one this summer and I tried it out and loved it. It was easily the most fun board I have ever ridden. When you hit the wake it's like jumping on a trampoline. And the landings are very forgiving too. So, a website that I like to look at from time to time, BoardersBestBuy.com, had a deal on this board that I simply couldn't pass up. I finally got to ride it this afternoon, and it was super fun. Of course, the conditions didn't hurt either. Hardly anyone else was out on the lake. I rode from one end of the LSL to the other without seeing another boat. Fall is awesome. Air and water are still pretty warm, but everyone thinks summer is over. Which I don't mind at all. Hopefully, we'll be able to ride until November.

In other non-wakeboard related news, this past weekend Johanna and I joined Greg and Kim in ....CROSSING THE RIVER!!! We all went to my favorite Brasilian restaraunt (in St. Louis), Yemanja. It was excellent as always. I recommend the Torradinhas, Empanadas, and the Lombo. We had alot of fun and it's pretty crazy to think that in 4 days Greg and Kim are going to have a baby. But it's cool and we're really happy for them.

As for a Guammy-like post on our upcoming journey to Memphis, clearly you don't remember much about Memphis, Greg. Anyway, I doubt I'll be able to pull Johanna away from Sparky long enough to see much of anything.

Mdub has apparently forsaken Bloggy. Once he refused to post a thing and his comments were rambling, misspelled works of inside-joke-laden art. Now he writes 5 millon word long posts on his travels and leaves us wondering if he ever works at all. And while I'm speaking of comments, a certain brother of mine (whose name rhymes with shmorton) feels that JC00265139876589567 and Jar Jar Binks comments have become indistinguishable from each other. I suppose there is some truth to this but I can offer a couple key "tells" to help the readers of the network figure out who's who. IF someone seems to RANDOMLY capitalize WORDS and to confuse the WEATHER patterns of the PACIFIC northwest with THOSE of Minnesota, it's SPARKY'S dad. If they comment first, it's JC0086300288t5278232.

"i'm at a loss for words..." but i'm gonna talk for 15 minutes

Alright, I was gonna do a Welton comment but I decided to just do my own post in response to Sparky's Dad's musings on swimming. Yeah, it is cool that everyone wants to talk about swimming right now. And it is a cool and weird sport. One of the things I like best about it is that it is truly an individual sport. You can't blame your performance on anything or anyone else. There are no bad calls. Your performance is all you. You can't yell at the ref in Spanish and get kicked out of a swim meet.

I totally agree about the silver and bronze medal thing. If I got the silver medal and set an American Record, I would be ecstatic. Like if I was Cavic, I would have been stoked. The best swimmer ever BARELY touched me out to win. The only guy better than him is the best swimmer in the world, ever. I'd be ok with that.

And I also agree about comparing it to other sports. What Phelps did was incredible but you really can't compare it to any other sport. Swimming is swimming. He is easily the best swimmer in the world. But the best athlete? No. The best athlete is someone who excels at multiple sports. And I'm not sure who that is. Everything is so specialized now. People like Jim Brown, or better yet Jim Thorpe, aren't around anymore. Speaking of which, if you've never heard of Jim Thorpe, do a little research and read about him. I read an awesome book about him titled "Carlisle vs. Army." I highly recommend it. That guy was the MAN.

Anyway back to swimming, Johanna and I were talking about this and about if everything was equal - same suits, goggles, training, all at their peak, etc. - how awesome would a race between Phelps, Spitz, Johnny Weismuller and Duke Kahanamoku be?

I don't know how Phelps won the 100 fly but it was my favorite race to watch. And when he came off the wall at the 50 I knew he had it. Phelps' reaction to winning that race was the best. And his mom's was classic too.

I haven't worn the super cool new suits, so I really can't comment on them. And I also don't know what they do to girls' boobs. I would imagine that the suits are pretty tight though.

Shot at Neal. Nice.

Soccer players trying to stretch like swimmers makes for high comedy I would imagine.

Rowdy and Andrea need to go away.

Water depth, temperature, and drainage really DO make a pool fast or slow.

Lastly, thanks for the props. Swimming is awesome. I'll leave you with something to think about: Sparky = gonna be tall, big hands, big feet, pool in the backyard....it's not too early is all I'm saying.

Wahoo, I mean....Bass???

Xavi and I decided to try and catch our dinner today. Xavi brought his gear over to New Town, despite the treacherous floodwaters lurking off 370, and we journeyed to the front lakes. After 20 minutes of grueling casting we hit pay dirt. Joff caught what we think was a Rock Bass. It came in at a not-at-all respectable 6 ounces (maybe). We had hoped to have fish for dinner and to sell the excess meat to Marsalla's but Shakespeares Pizza over at the Wine Bar actually sounded alot better and I'm pretty sure that Marsalla's doesn't actually buy fish caught out of the New Town lakes. So we didn't have to beat the poor little guy to death, rather we let him return to his peaceful life in the lake.

The first part of our expedition was uneventful, a couple quick hits but no takers. We switched up our lures, I opened up a Schalfly, and we even got up and walked down the shore. Xavi finally decided to walk down the lake a bit more and about 5 minutes later the fish was on the line. It really didn't put up any fight at all and I didn't have to help Xavi one bit. In terms of great experiences, I had alot more fun wakeboarding this morning behind an X2. And Xavi probably had more excitement at the 4 softball games he played today. But fishing was kinda fun. We were worried that he might shake loose since he was so small but Xavi's skills were too much for the little fish to handle.

Sick Day Poll

Well I'm home sick today and bored out of my mind. I'm pretty sure that I have pneumonia, or some similar upper respiratory infection type thing (I'm pretty sure it's pneumonia because a couple people I work with have it, it's highly contagious apparently, and I've displayed almost all of the symptoms according to WebMD). Coughing all night is great fun. Even more fun is sitting around all day not being able to do anything on my days off. And as anyone who went to college knows, doing nothing is only fun when you have lots of stuff to do. I'm not even missing work because I have Fridays off....(sigh).

So I'm going to steal an idea from my favorite radio show and administer a "sick day poll." I just enjoyed a Shakespeare's pizza for lunch and I'm watching Transgression (yes, again) and wishing it was summer. So that will explain questions 1 and 2 and my answers. Anyway here goes, feel free to answer all of following:

1) What's your favorite pizza place?

2) What's the best season?

3) Should Jon and Jo get a dog, a baby, or a piano?

4) What are you going to do with your check from George Bush?

5) Are the Cardinals for real?

You already know my thoughts on 1 and 2, for 3 I would say dog right now, I'm getting new tires for my truck courtesy of W, and for 5, yeah I think they are.

10 Big Points

If you watch American Gladiators you know that the contenders never just get 10 points, it's always "10 BIG Points." So in honor of the finale Sunday night I thought I would do a top 10 list of sorts.

10) STL Boat Show. Jojo and I attended the the St. Louis Boat Show last weekend at the Edward Jones Dome. It was my first time ever going to one of these and it was pretty fun. It was really cool to see and sit in some of the boats. We sat in a Mastercraft X-80 which retails for roughly $120,000 and it was awesome. Other boats that I would love to own are the Mastercraft X Star, Malibu Wakesetter 247 LSV, and the Sea-Doo Wake Edition PWC. Truthfully I would be happy with almost any boat but I can dream right?

9) Winter is no fun. In fact I hate it. As I was sitting in complete gridlock in Earth City on Monday night trying to get home I was questioning why I ever decided to come home from Dubai, no winter storms there. I think we need to move to Arizona.

8) Shakespeare's Pizza in New Town!! This is pretty cool. The Domain Street Wine Bar (which has an obnoxious giant neon sign) and Marsala's Market are both now importing Shakespeare's from Columbia. It's the half-baked pizzas, which aren't quite as good as the real thing but still very good. I have yet to enjoy the pizza in my freezer because when I last preheated the oven I started a fire in it due to previous pizza debris.

7) Easter Candy is here!! Easily the best holiday candy out there, Cadbury Eggs alone catapult it above all other holiday candy.

6) Men's Health Power Training is a book I picked up after Christmas and I started following it's program shortly after. I really like the workouts it recommends and I'm already starting to see the results. However, I haven't been doing alot of lower body lifting the last couple of years (especially when I was running alot) and now I'm developing the muscles in my legs to the point that it is beginning to affect the way my pants are fitting. Which is kinda weird.

5) New Jack Johnson Cd, Sleep Through the Static. I've only listened to it a little bit but I think it is impossible for Jack to put out bad music.

4) Team1380 is local sports radio that I have on pretty much every morning in the truck. If you're in St. Louis check it out. Really funny stuff and they occasionally even talk about sports.

3) Transgression is a really cool wakeboarding dvd I got at the boat show. The music is really good and the riding is awesome. The best part is Randall Harris's section. He actually has a really interesting story and he's on the team now which is cool but his riding is jawdropping. Watching it really makes me want to ride.

2) American Gladiators finale this Sunday night! A 2 hour "event"!! Should be pretty cool but I don't think that Evan or Monica can be beaten. They're simply too good at the Eliminator. Their competition will need a huge lead going into the Eliminator and that's probably not gonna happen.

1) Dunkin Donuts returns to STL!!!!!! This is the best news I've gotten in a while and it can't happen soon enough.

Dumpy McDumperson

Ok so I guess it's my turn to dump. First and foremost, I want to say how happy I am with the return of one of the greatest TV shows of our time - American Gladiators. There are some flaws, way too much talking for one, but overall it is a great addition to Monday night, which is the only night we really watch TV.

Things I like about AG:

*All of the events over water. Even "Hang Tough" is better now. Also I like how you have to swim under the fire in the Eliminator.

*The new Ninja Warrior-like Eliminator is much better. I love how it pretty much wipes out the contenders and they can barely make it up the "travelator" or whatever they call the treadmill thing.

*The whole thumbs down taunting of the contenders when the Gladiator beats them and they fall into the water. Jojo and I have already got it down.

Things I don't like about AG:

*Wolf. Lame. Looks like Ben Stiller from Dodgeball on roids.

*All of the trash talking and human interest crap. Just play the games, we don't need all of the contrived drama. It actually makes me like the contenders less and root against them. I was pretty psyched when stupid 34 year old Jeff who waited 14 years to be on AG lost to the Spider Monkey. I read that one of the contenders breaks their femur, I was hoping it would be Jeff. One side note on the Spider Monkey, don't bet against him in the Eliminator. If you've seen Ninja Warrior you know the smaller, spry gymnastic guys destroy obstacle courses.

I had other things I was going to write about but I can't remember them now. Ohio State is getting killed by LSU as I write this. And all of the local weather people are going nuts because of the storms that are all over tonight. Good times, I guess it's an improvement over all of the reports on a closed highway. "We're bringing you team coverage to let you know that yes, Highway 40 is indeed closed down." Be sure to use alternate routes.

Oh yeah, here's a couple things I'm reading right now:

Lots of Things

Ok, so i've neglected the blog long enough. Lots of stuff has happened since the last time I blogged but I will try to hit all the highlights and post some pics.

First of all, and most importantly I guess, I went to Hawaii and got married. I don't know if I really have the words to adequately describe how great the trip was. Hawaii is a really cool place and I'm glad we did what we did. I definitely did not want to do the whole big wedding thing, and it was awesome to get married on the beach. It was weird because the whole wedding only took like 10 minutes, when we started our vows was when it really hit me that yeah, this is actually happening. But it was exactly the way Johanna and I wanted it to be and the whole trip was better than I could have imagined.

^Waialae Beach Park was a really pretty beach. We didn't really care what beach we got married on, we just asked Matt (the pastor who married us) to pick one he thought was good. That lei I was wearing was really itchy by the way. But still way more comfortable than a tux, and I didn't have to wear shoes. Johanna didn't like that the wind was blowing her hair all over the place but I really like it when she just leaves it down and it is all wavy and natural looking.

As for my thoughts on being married after one month, our lives are not all that different and I'm really used to wearing my ring now. I'm really not used to calling her "my wife" though. It's just weird. I'm guessing at some point you get used to saying it.

^Surfing at Waikiki was just one of those things I had to do. It's the birthplace of surfing and probably the easiest place to surf there is. Of course that means that the place is always super crowded but I managed to get out there with 200 other people, dodge outrigger canoes and beginners on huge longboards and catch a few waves. It was really fun. I loved the fact that almost everything "to do" in Hawaii involved the ocean. Surfing, snorkeling at Shark's Cove, and hanging out on the North Shore were my favorite things about Hawaii. Other than getting married and other wedding related "activities" of course.

^This is me and my Goddaughter Sydney. She's super cute, I definitely need to get to Columbia soon to see her again. I suppose I would like to hang out with her parents too.

^This is me and my new friend Donovan. We hung out alot when Johanna and I went to Chicago for her friend Chrissy's wedding.

Oh yeah, our new apartment is cool too. You can see some pictures over on Johanna's Blog but I'll post some once we finally have everything unpacked, and once we get our couch. New Town is an interesting place, but all in all I like it. I really like being able to ride my bike to the pool, or being able to walk to the market or coffee shop. It is really quiet though and sometimes I miss the hubbub of the Iwaszkowiec house. Speaking of which; Brazil 3, Argentina 0. "Yes! In the face!" I can't believe that my dad and I both weren't home to watch that today.

Of course I want that fried....

Vacations are nice. My favorite part is not having to set the alarm clock. It's nice to be able to get up whenever I want. Also nice is eating lots of seafood and hanging out on the beach all day. I almost put myself into a food coma tonight though due to Tapas Night at Tamara's in Apalach. Lots of good stuff. We have definitely seen lots of wildlife on this trip too. But if you want details you should check out Johanna's Blog.


^This picture is me and my dolphin friends, they were pretty close and the gulf was pretty much a lake that day. But we see dolphins so much it's no big deal at this point.

^This was yesterday morning, pretty fun shorebreak. The waves actually got better throughout the day and The Dolphin Whisperer (joff) and I had a fun little sundown session. We went out to the sandbar and were having a good time trading waves until the Whisperer saw a large shape in the wave we were about to take off on. We figured out later that it was a ray (we saw another one this afternoon) but at that point we weren't taking any chances. Especially after the alligator incident a couple nights ago.

^This is me and Jo at Harry A's on St. George Island. There's not really much of a story behind this picture, I just liked it. There was some funny karaoke going on at this place though. And some line dancing. But I was just there to eat shrimp.

Other things I am enjoying about this trip, in no particular order: having nothing to do besides sit on the beach, reading books, skittles, cold gatorades after being in the ocean, eating shrimp, aloe vera, and not wearing shoes. Unfortunately, there have not been any gummy bear throwing contests or zub-zub games on this trip.

I Don't Want To Be Old

Well I was tempted to just write another comment on Jeremy's last post, a "Matt comment" if you will, but I guess the time has come for me to make another post of my own. I don't know if I can inspire 14 comments but I'll do my best.

Many of you know that I enjoy working out quite a bit. It is generally a good thing as I like being fit, however over the last few years I have been exposed to a culture I was not really that aware of previously. The Gym. I could probably write a short book on all of the facets of the gym that I find intriguing but today I'm going to focus on 2 that really bug me: old naked guys and water aerobics.

Now, I've never been in the women's locker room at a gym so I can't comment on that, but in my experience in men's locker rooms old guys sure like to walk around the locker room naked. And the older they are, the more they walk around. It's like they have to see every little bit of the locker room. I don't get it at all. I was a swimmer for a long time and I spent many years around lots of guys in speedos but I will never be comfortable parading around a locker room totally naked. And these guys totally don't care, they'll stand around watching CNBC or Cartoon Network or whatever the TVs have on, talk to their "gym friends", or just take a few naked laps around the locker room. It's weird.

But maybe not as weird as what I think is probably the most ridiculously ineffective form of exercise there is - water aerobics. There is really nothing aerobic about water aerobics. It's just a bunch of old ladies kind of hopping around in the pool. And usually half of them are complaining about how cold the water is. I swear that there is one lady in the water aerobics "class" at my gym that wears a springsuit. (For those of you that are unfamiliar with wetsuits, a springsuit is a wetsuit that stops at the elbows and knees). Anyway, swimming is fantastic exercise, really good for you, but hopping around a pool for 45 minutes or so is another story. It might be kinda fun but let's not kid ourselves and think that it's the same as lifting weights, running, biking, or even walking. Plus, they always hang on the lane lines. I was a lifeguard for too long for that not to bother me.

In other swimming related news I have to agree with Neal, Michael Phelps is pretty much not human. If you guys aren't aware of what he's doing at the World Championships you should check it out. He's winning everything he swims and just completely demolishing world records.
Also, you better believe I'm gonna see Pride. But first I need to go see a certain movie involving ice skating, Will Ferrell, and Napolean Dynamite.

The Slippery Slope

While Joff might feel that he is upping his coolness lately, I feel quite the opposite. I am sadly being pulled into the depths of nerdom. Let's take a look at some of my recent activities. Starting and contributing to a blog? Check. Setting up an ebay account and actually buying something through said account? Check. Reading the first Harry Potter book and starting on the second one? Check and check. I'm sinking into the quicksand of nerdiness. Someone needs to throw me a rope. It's too bad football season is so far away. Of course I bought a new wakeboard on ebay, which is actually pretty cool. However now I am being pulled into a bidding war over new bindings. Every time I turn on this computer I'm checking my stupid ebay first. It was a dagger to the heart tonight when I learned that I had been outbid. I'm formulating a bidding strategy because I still have a day and a half before the auction is up.

I guess it's good that I still lift weights, swim, run, and watch ESPN. And that I'm getting really excited for wakeboarding season. But if I become part of Joff's guild in the near future you guys have my permission to stage an intervention.

Under the weather

Remember when you were a little kid and you got sick and got to miss a couple days of school and everything? It was never really that bad right? In fact it was kind of nice because you got to stay home, lay in bed all day, watch daytime tv, and drink lots of 7up. Not a bad trade off for a little fever. Well, being sick when you are old it is not that fun. I've spent the better part of the last 4 days with a fever. Today has been the first day since Saturday night that I've been able to sit up and that I've actually wanted to eat anything. I've also consumed copious amounts of 7up. Which is just as good as I remembered. However, that's been about the only pleasant thing I've experienced the last few days. Johanna did take good care of me, and made me go to the doctor when I really didn't want to go, but I'm glad that I'm feeling better. And able to speak in complete sentences again.

It was nice to be able to catch up on my daytime tv though. I've watched a whole lot of Sportscenter and I'm pretty sick of hearing about the whole San Diego Chargers coaching thing. Though I do think that they were the best team in the NFL and that if they had a different coach they probably would've beaten the Patriots. I will also never understand the appeal of NASCAR, and the ridiculous amount of coverage ESPN gives it. Other new favorites from the last 4 days on the couch: Maui Fever (oddly fascinating), Engaged and Underage (ditto), Days of Our Lives (an old favorite really), 2 A Days. and the Grammy Awards. I think I've also watched the 13th Warrior like 3 times since Monday (those stupid dish network movie channels suck me in every time).

That's all I've got for now.

The "F Word"

So my nerd girlfriend made this blog for me. I'm hoping my friends and brother will contribute to it as well. I'm looking at you Matt. Anyway, you will notice that I said girlfriend and not fiancee, even though I am in fact engaged. Why? Because I hate the F word. I just can't bring myself to say it, even writing it hurts. So I don't say it. And Johanna and I have been referring to each other as our "f words". Which is pretty funny on multiple levels.

This has made me think of other words and phrases that I hate. These include:

"set the date" - Also wedding related, this bugs me because you don't set the date for any other event, yet the second you get engaged every person you come into contact with asks you if you've set the date. It makes my skin crawl.

"pamper(ing)" - With Valentine's Day approaching I'm hearing this one alot more than I usually would. I think I don't like it because it makes me think of diapers. And I think it's disturbing to hear commercials on sports radio where the hosts keep using this word.

" The Countrywide Home Loans Guy" - While not a word or phrase, this guy is on TV 24/7 and I hate him. Every time one of these commercials comes on I scream and turn the channel as quickly as possible.

That's all I can think of on that topic for now. I'll try not to be so negative on my next post.