Monday, May 5, 2008

"The Lake House" the hottest new show on television

So...there have comments regarding the "timing" of this blog, and the fact that the "sick day poll" has been left up for so long. I would like to begin by answering these critics.

First off, many members of this blog (as well as many of the readers) have been in the presence of one another over the past few weekends. To write about events that everyone attended would be very odd. For example one post might read "Hey remember when we got lost in Memphis going down for Ben's wedding?" and we would have comments like "yea that was a good time" and then it would be awkward blog silence.

Or we could have said something like "Matt and Vicki's farewell party was good, I am really gonna miss them" which you be followed with something like "Yeah, it was fun, I'll miss them too." Again followed by awkward blog silence. To conclude this section, we can't instantly reminisce or talk about some event that many of us were at, it would just seem odd.

However I can talk about the recent excursion I had with my wife and friends to a land of fascination and wonder. Many of you know the wonderful land I speak of, The Lake of the Ozarks.

We made the usual 2-3 hour trek in around 4 hours, how is that possible you ask, well you have to stop multiple times. Our first stop took place in the beautiful area of Warrenton. The local eatery we chose was Sonic which apparently is “America’s Drive In”. The locals were very hospitable.

A few notes about Warrenton: 1. The Chinese buffet was the most populated eatery in the entire city, 2. the gas crunch is apparently hitting hard in Warrenton as it had an unusually high amount of walkers making their way from the hang-out of Warrenton (Super Wal-Mart). 3. This last post is not necessarily in Warrenton but near, The “Elvis is Alive” museum with the large cutout of Elvis out front was apparently sold and is relocating to Mississippi. The building’s owner (a creepy evangelist) is making it into a food pantry/drug rehab center which is noble but rumor has it that the Elvis cutout is now a Jesus cutout which I didn’t get to see because I wasn’t paying attention but next time I am going that way I am keeping my eyes peeled.

Our second stop was at the lovely city named “Kingdom City”. I don’t know what Kingdom the city represents; a few ideas are the kingdom of truckers, the kingdom of Hoosiers, the kingdom of parents whose children have to pee, or the kingdom of youth groups who need a place to stop on their way to camp. We saw all four of these groups represented in the kingdom. We also saw a contingent of Asians apparently looking for a new kingdom since they seemed to be lost and shocked that an American would hold a door open for them. Apparently McDonald’s are taking the place of churches in the new world as it is one of the new “safe places” that one runs to when they feel lost and alone.

The last stop we made on our way was in the city bearing my name, our state’s great capital, Jeff City. We stopped in perhaps the place everyone goes to get supplies for a lake trip of course I am talking of Wal-Mart. The sights and sounds of Wal-Mart are to terrifying and disturbing to be mentioned here. Needless to say we made it out with our supplies and finally arrived at the lake without a stop in the ever popular Eldon, Missouri.

We had an enjoyable time wandering the Osage Beach outlet mall in search of what all outlet mall shoppers want, “the perfect deal”. The perfect deal was not found, but some lovely purchases were made, and the day was capped off with chocolate covered goodness for all. (Side note: Any time a guy friend is eating a chocolate covered banana you have full go ahead to hurl as gay jokes at him as possible while he eats the banana).

Saturday night we were back at the Lake House, which we decided would be an excellent idea for a show/book. If I ever have a vacation home I will leave a book in which everyone must write a synopsis of what occurred while they were there. For instance, “This week on the Lake House, Jeff snores real loud and people hear him over the TV. How will Amie respond? Find out next!” I think this show could take off.

Anyway, in ending I have a question for any medical personal/lifeguards, at what temperature does hypothermia set in? What would say the temperature of a lake need to be, and how long would one need to be in it before they were in trouble?

These questions are purely hypothetical as only and idiot would go swimming in the Lake of the Ozarks at this time of year.

(After further research on hypothermia from the infallible Wikipedia it is quite possible my swimming companion may have had stage one hypothermia, but she is fine now.
And now I know about it and knowing is half the battle.)

16 comments:

Jo said...

Wal-Mart is just a scary place and that fact is only enhanced when you follow a trip to Wal-Mart with a trip to Target. The difference is alarming. You would think that a Sunday morning would be a safe time to try Wal-Mart, but it's not. It's never safe. Every once in a while, I think, "I haven't been there in a while - I'm going to give them another shot." Remind me of this comment next time I have one of those moments. The only good thing is that I found the On The Border queso in the plastic container. I bought two.

Memphis was fun (good times) and we already miss Matt & Vick.

Anonymous said...

Remember that one time on the blog when we all left comments because there was an interesting new post to respond to? That was a good time...

*let the awkward silence now commence*

Anonymous said...

wow. someone needs to settle down...give your friends some TIME to respond. the beauty of bloggy mcbloggerson is that we break blog rules and refuse to succumb to the peer pressure of always churning out posts and comments...we let things settle and fester and then BRING IT. that is why we get 23 comments...

also, I would like to add that waiting so long to posts keeps the audience wanting more. there are tactical reasons for postponing new posts.

ok XAVI...good post. I think one could set up an entire blog page about the LAKE OF THE OZARKS and have ample material to work with for a good year or two. that place is special. and by special I mean odd, crazy, funny, beautiful, weird, odd, crazy, funny...I don't know if the Daniel's house makes the lake experience crazier or the lake experience makes the Daniel's house crazier. chicken or egg?

yes, the trip to and from the lake is sometimes/usually just as important as the lake experience. why did you stop in warrenton? that seems unnecessary...especially with the mentioned KINGDOM city beckoning not far past. also, stopping again at WALMART breaks many rules of "travel mode". why not stock up BEFORE leaving St. Peters and then travel time is safe?

recording what happens in that house (or at the lake in general) is a bad bad idea. we can't even talk about those things until we're 75 years old.

lake thoughts:

-those bedrooms are the smallest rooms I've ever been in...

-that cove is a fun spot to get a tan...while paddle boating.

-the hills getting to their house are fun. and one should be completely sober while trying to drive them at all times.

-playing ALABAMA at full blast, specifically "High Cotton", with the windows down is a prequisite for those same hills...

(either that or BONE THUGS N HARMONY) ha.

by the way, I can't believe you guys went swimming.

and yes, it was fun to have you guys in memphis. you all should come back to meet Sparky, ride horses, and go swimming...

and I miss Matt/Vicki too.

Anonymous said...

Sorry guys, there's just one final between me and a college degree, and I've got a whole week to study for it. So I got a little sassy after running out of ways to amuse myself on the internet. You're special just the way you are, Bloggy, don't ever change.

And I miss Matt and Vicki, too.

Anonymous said...

i went swimming today and was nowhere near catching hypothermia, i may have dungee fever or malaria but im pretty far from being cold. really this place isnt too hot and there is always a nice breeze. we bought a totally pimped out car with quadruple tinted windows though. its kind of a necessity and glad we have it. its kinda like always parking in the shade. but we drove it at night for the first time tonight and had a pretty hard time seeing out, im not really sure its street legal but we are going to keep that on the low down, no doubt. we took a really cool hike to an ok waterfall the other day (why do hikes always have to end at waterfalls) but it passes a WWII japanese tank which was pretty strange to see just sitting along the path. it got real steep at times and my friend steve broke his ankle and i had to carry him out on my back. he hopped a little bit of the way but it was pretty forrest gump of me except i wasnt getting shot at by charlie, he didnt end up dying and i like to think im not on the fringe of being retarded, but other than that, it was just like forrest gump. we contemplated letting him float down the river to the phillippean sea, but he wasnt up for it. but things are good. we got a water front condo all lined up barring any typhoons or further earthquakes. in closing, id like to not stray from the subject at hand any further and commend joff and co for a nice trip down memory lane. my lake experience is limited but i usually had fun. and id watch pretty much any video showcasing the day in the life of joff. the kingdom city you refer to is the kingdom of fireworks available all year long in a state where fireworks are prohibited. that mc donalds is quite possibly the crossroads of america. im now convinced the japanese are everywhere. i think one is sleeping under our bed as we speak.

i miss everybody except matt and vicki.

Anonymous said...

Hypothermia is like having ebola, but without the internal liquification of organs...Wal-mart is very much like having mental hypothermia...final exams cause hypothermia which results in the liquification of your mental organs (is there more than 1?)...and Iron Man was a GREAT movie!!!!

***btw..."on the finge of retarded" is my new most favorite expression, kudos to the originator!

Anonymous said...

compared to my siblings, i don't have nearly as much lake of the ozarks experience to draw on. but in my limited time there i can say that it is an extremely entertaining place. in contrast, one should never step foot inside of a walmart unless there is no alternative.

matt and vicki skyped us the other night which was cool but kinda weird. i'm not sure what to make of skype.

i'm watching the "masquerade ball/secret admirer" episode of saved by the bell from the tori years right now. a vastly underrated episode in my opinion. easily one of my favorite episodes despite the presence of tori. it's not as dramatic as the zack & kelly break-up or the jessie hooked on drugs episodes but it's much funnier.

Anonymous said...

guamhead.blogspot.com

good luck gumshoes.

Anonymous said...

MGW has a blog.

the universe will now implode.

where is Jesus? I know he is coming back!

Anonymous said...

Stop the pointless commenting in a futile attempt to boost your comment factor. this behaviour is shamless in a way that doesnt mean with out shame.

And yes, upon clicking "post" i did feel a slight rumble deep within the universe, kinda like when pippen knocked that bucket down the well in those mines and then stirred up that big thing with the club.

Anonymous said...

Does anyone else find it frustrating that one cannot post on Guamy McGuamerton without signing in as a google/blogger? If there was a blog competition, G McG would lose due to the inability of guests commenting under any alias.

Anonymous said...

Wow, ease ease. a click has been made. it did exceed my computer skills to figure out which thing to click, but i think i did it. guve me another chance.

Anonymous said...

yes. I concur. I remarked in the P.S. on the comment I posted on GUAMY...

maybe we all should not comment in protest of this annoyance.

Anonymous said...

whoops. that is crazy. MGW swooped in and commented at the same time I was...so my comment agrees with "dealio"...but sequence got goofed.

Anonymous said...

you guys are all haters. and i think its no coincidence that guammy has not been linked by this sites administrator. he lay awake at night in fear that his blog will become overtaken.

we had some awesome philly cheese steak sandwiches last night at a place called steaks and shakes. this place couldnt be further from the similar sounding steak and shake. i.e. no reusable plates, chicken fingers or lame comercials but we did takehomeasack, just i dont think they are ready to call it that yet. what a difference a couple of s's make.

Anonymous said...

wow. that link on the side there to GUAMMY is just fantastic. now if only the administrator of THAT website would put a link to Bloggy then we would be practically seamless!!!